Poop

The world is so impossibly sad sometimes.
Ugly, awful things happen.
Things that remind me that shit will happen beyond anyones control. That there are times when there's not one goddamn thing you can do to make it better or to change it. That we are but minuscule specks of dust floating in the ether.

And then, on those same days, as I'm flipping through pictures on my phone- I find a picture of my toilet full of poop.

On Friday, as the news of the massacre came in slowly, I was scrolling through pictures on my iPhone to distract me from the news on TV. Cute baby picture, cute 8 year old picture, awesome dinner picture, toilet full of crap picture, cute baby picture again....
I froze when I saw the poop picture and had to look at it closely to make sure it was in fact my toilet.... It was.
I immediately accused my husband of being a vile idiot. He swore it wasn't him. I then went to his second in command- our 8 year old son; his doppelganger in every way. Denial. And he was kind of bummed he didn't do it. I didn't fully believe him.

I was stumped. Who did the phantom deuce belong to? Who would take a picture with my phone?

Later that evening, walking with HM- (my 5 year old daughter)- I mentioned the poo picture to her to see if she would maybe narc her older brother out. She looked at me and smirked.
Astounded, I asked: "You did NOT take a picture of your doody with my phone, did you?"
HM replied- "yep" *laughing uncontrollably* "isn't that a funny prank?"

Silence.

I have a 5 year old daughter who took my iPhone, went to the bathroom, took a picture of her poop and left it on my phone for days in order for me to find it unexpectedly. To punk me.
She's 5.

So besides being disturbed at the above facts, I admire her comedic timing, her sense of a great prank and that she knows that poop is (almost) always funny.

The weekend went on. The sadness kept rolling in with every flip of the channel.

Sometimes you need some poop to laugh at.